Dun be shock~

First of all, I have to apologies… for log in to your blog without your permission… I knew is rude and I just try my luck…

So what do you think my forgiveness is? Does it really mean anything to u? And how you expect I will just forgive you like that… the following post should be in my blog yet… it was inconvenient to be in it…

Is that god’s will? To lead me to your blog again? Is been few months that I never step into the blog, if I am not too boring to click into Joyce’s blog, and from the limited links… I clicked into your blog… is a dead blog, which has no updates for so many months until 1st April 2009, or maybe is April Fool…?

A password protected post… raised up my curiosity… I tried so many password, your friendster password, your previous blog post password and so on… after all possible passwords that are related to yourselves been tried… I started to try with my name, which I never ever wanted to see… the first one I tried is “evelyn0nair”, the page loading take such a long time and makes me nervous… end up is still blank… second password I tried is “Geminieve”, still… is the blank page… finally I saw the post content with the password of my first name…

Obviously… that post is referred to me… apologies to me… guess how I feel? I just finish my post of my decision to break up with my current boyfriend… and I got this… so what is the whole thing trying to boost me for?

Whatever in that post, I would to say is bull-shyt… I don’t even know what the hell is the main reason that lead to our break-up… Seriously… I took a lot of times and effort to recover from it… I spend so many love, effort and tears on you… and what the hell did I gained from it? No doubt to say that I am damm freaky ANGRY of you…! Not because of being dump but because I really love you… although you are not the one I love the most… but you’re just one after my 3rd boyfriend(the one I love the most)… In another words, you are the second boyfriend that I love most… I did what ever that I can do to rescue our relationship that time… I seriously lost my mind and I just don’t know what the hell am I doing that time…

Is just last night… Facebook test told me that I actually haven’t completely let go my ex-boyfriend… So is that true? I had no IDEA!!

Honestly, I am damm freaky frustrated on this… In fact I know I have to bear the responsible as well… If I didnt come and view your blog… If I never try out the password, If I never seen all this… What do you actually want from me with this post? Forgiveness? And what else? You’ve mentioned “Love so hard”… and you are the one who said you no longer love me… so you are the one who should say “Love so hard” or me???

Please think properly… until now… still you did not tell me any VALID reason of breaking up… when people asked me… I could just said “I don’t know!” Khor Siang Teng, from the beginning until now… forgot about my birthday… what have you did for me? What do you think that you really did it purposely for your girlfriend that time? I’ve trying so hard to convinced myself that you’re just do not know how to play the roles of boyfriend… finding so much excuse for you for treating me bad… Who ever surrounding me told me that they felt my sadness hidden in myself when I am be with you… And I told myself…”I am not!!!”

After the talk in Cypress, I do not deny that I seriously feel bad about everything… heart broken badly and I felt empty in myself… whatever I did is just… so stupid… and I told myself “This guy seriously didn’t love you anymore…” because he rather to see myself crying at the park and he just wanted to stand so far away from me and just leave me alone there… I knew you were there… looking at me and Bs… whatever it is… you are just sooooooo DONKEY!

I took so many days and night to cry… to convince myself to let go… even after I be with my boyfriend, I am still thinking of you… remember 6th day of CNY? I keep on asking you whether want to join us for dinner… that time I actually had a boyfriend… yet I wanted to see you and just have a dinner with you… I do not kow why am I sooooooo STUPID… allow you to drag me until the very last minutes… makes me feel so bad because of this tiny issues… and I told myself that “I will never ever contact this feller until the anger release OR you come and find me yourself”, I continue my life with my boyfriend and I did it! Didn’t contact you for guess 1 month plus after that issue, until my labtop broke down, I was forced to find you to asked about my labtop stuff… I thought is just that simple…

And what’s now? Written this post to me and just simply ask for my forgiveness?? So who do you think YOU ARE? You know what? Tears fall again when this post comes to here…! I seriously had no more energy to take all this…

If you worry that I will log in to ur account again… please change your password if you want… anyway… I am not going to log in again also~

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all thing are increasing

since i grow up until now …

wat also increasing

transport fee +daily expenses+ tuition fee +petrol

even suger noodle economic rice also increasing

age increasing year by year the trouble facing year by year also increasing

 exam  also  become hardy compared year by year

now i no wan be grow more i cannot settle all thing in immediacy ady …because all getting hard and tough

but my pocket money or even part time job salary no increase 1 y ?

haizzz

不能跟情人说的话

不能跟情人说的话

作词：姚若龙　作曲：陈小霞

有时候对一个人那么用心
却还是搞不清楚他的逻辑
谈恋爱谁没演过一点戏
装没事　装忘记　装相信

有时候和一个人那么紧密
却还是忍不住想保护自己
谁恋爱不曾藏一点秘密
留防备　留回忆　留心情

谢谢你总是陪我分享
不能跟情人说的话
我反反复复你也从不笑我
老是骂他却又离不开他

谢谢你总是替我收藏
不想跟情人说的话
我胡思乱想　你只握着我手
让我释放　然后慢慢宽广

有时候和一个人那么紧密
却还是忍不住想保护自己
谁恋爱不曾藏一点秘密
留防备　留回忆　留心情
谢谢你总是陪我分享

mistake

the mood cannot run far aways
moody tis feel day …duno y …
feel tired very tired to continue like that ..but i duno wat problem i facing ..
after make a deeply thinking maybe is a wrong decision was make by me ..
tis few day ..connot sleep well…
feel wanna crying but the tear connot drop down ..
feel so unassisted
wat happen to me now ..
i also duno what thing i facing now ..maybe tis is a mistake
wat6 dicision i should make ..
god pls teach me wat should i do

LIBRA

Cute Horoscopes – View All Signs THE SIGN OF LIBRA INTRO ASTROLOGY OUTLOOK LOVE CAREER HEALTH FINANCES FUN STATS Positive Traits Symbol and Dates Negative Traits JUSTICE GENTILITY AESTHETICS CHARM IDEALISM EQUILIBRIUM The Scales Sep. 24 to Oct. 23 QUARRELSOMENESS SELF-INDULGENCE INDECISION PROCRASTINATION TALKATIVENESS MANIPULATION Excerpt From “The New Astrology©” by Suzanne White Have you ever met a person who seems to find everything horrid wonderful and everything wonderful horrid? Have you ever known anyone who finds hidden beauty and grace in people you wouldn’t want to take the bus with? Do you know a person who always invariably and constantly alters his or her viewpoint to suit the moment? If the answer to these questions is “yes,” you probably know a Libran. Faced with conflict. Libra never exhibits cowardice. Nor does Libra charge ahead willy-nilly with guns blazing. Instead, Libra attempts to establish negotiations. Libra wants to settle things amicably. Consider first one side, then the other. Libra says, “Don’t be too quick to judge people on their face value. Give it time.” In fact, by the time Libra has finished flitting from one side of the argument to the other and back forty billion times, the war is very often over. Libra knows that life is loaded with undercurrents of evil and mined with trouble spots. But the Libran attitude is “Why look for the bad things? Why consider the evil and wretched side of life? Let’s put up another watercolor or run out and buy ourselves a lovely new negligee. You’11 see. We’ll all feel much, much better.” Librans themselves always try to remain on an even keel. They soothe the ill-tempered and cause raging rivers of dissension to flatten out and run smoothly. By means of their good humor and fine sense of what is pleasurable, Librans urge us gently along toward human understanding, beauty and righteousness. Yet, Librans are capable of being annoyingly argumentative It seems out of character, but there it is. Sometimes the gentle, diplomat needles others. He doesn’t want to win arguments. Just wants to find out what you’re thinking. Head him off at the pass. Caress the picky Libra’s forehead with dollars soaked in Givrey Chambertin. Librans love luxe. They surround themselves with prettiness and seem to require a comfortable, well-designed frame in which to picture themselves happy. Because of this excessive desire for “the finer things,” Librans, if they are sufficiently well looked after, might grow lazy. Perhaps it is unjust to say this as Librans are capable of hard work and tend to be serious about it. But in an ambience of charm and gentility, the Libran revels. In rustic or sparse surroundings the Libran feels cold and longs to return to the land of fashion and folderol. I have always felt that Librans talked too much. This opinion may be misguided. But still, I do find when I meet Librans for the first time that they have this annoying tendency to over-relate, to recount their life stories and all the details complete with sufferings and losses, injustices and wrongdoings, fears and doubts in Technicolor and Cinemascope. What I want to say to them is “Hey, maybe I don’t want to know about every hard-boiled egg you ever ate.” Hardly the strong silent type, Libra is placid (except when in a steaming rage) but blabby. Libras are not in a hurry, nor do they think other people ought to be. My Libra mother asked me once, “Why do you wash the dishes so fast?” I answered tersely, “Because I hate washing the dishes.” “Oh,” she said, with a pretty smile out of which I expected to see a flower grow. “I see.” She didn’t see at all. But to keep the peace.

1/7/2008 my mood

maybe for me is 2 tired or wat …i really duno wan i wan now …wt i feel now …
feel like something will happen …moody ..maybe la …i lazy o talk with ppl le…duno y
haizzz i really hate tis feel ..since i back gathering with my form 6 friends

 the memorize with faced before is very sweet go school 2gether and back to home 2 gether ..always kidding 2gether …
maybe …maybe ..i ady oldest in comparing with before ..i very hate tis feel
feel …wat feel i wan ? crazy de memorize at least 1 time in my whole life ..
or the fade from one’s memory form 1 time 2 1 time ..really stupid kelvin u …
wah …miss u all lo….2 year after we just meet 2 gether ..with a gathering in autocity
the time we go CC 2gether play whole night game and eat the “dian xin” when the shop just open
now …no more !!!tis kind happiness this miss it ….
ai ya no think so much la…sleep better ..be happly boy in this world …kelvin add oil …
getting a good result ..in ur eduction …all friends will more early graduate in compare with u
haizz ..no like tis feel …

segi college

yesterday the 1st day going to segi damn tired le…

6.50 am i wake up from my bed

7.15 am going out from home…my sister goign to her school and i go for jeti my parent go to penang ….

i reach jeti at 8.30 lucky no traffic jam ..at having a breakfast at there while waiting for friends …

9.30 am finally i at segi lo…all geting new …new college new life in penang and etc

after hearing the introduce from they lecture until 1pm ..we plan to skip it ..cause all no important 1 …

tu …duno wat time my friends send to to jeti agian …my journey to school ady finish for today ..keke i reach home at 5pm …

timetable a …so shui le…

take 5 sub for tis sem ….

monday 9-12am moral studies

tuesday 2-5pm financial accounting 1

wednesday 9-12am microeconomic and continue at 2-5pm malaysian studies

thuesday 9-12 am business math

haha …1sem got 2 LAN subject lo..so fast to start the LAN subject

and will go to melaka  in july for 3 day …to attend the program name is SLC all is free of charge le…wakaka ..so fun …

but damn tired ..plan to find hostel in penang lo…for me tis kind lazy man …

question u ask to me before

“we still friends” the answer i reply to u is YES we still friends

 even the msg u send me before ..maybe no u fault at all..maybe i also wrong because i got blame u about the MP

 let our 4 people happy memorize to keep into our four people heart …but let the time start from year1 sem1 in utar before u know each other and let the time stop at before y1s1 final exam …maybe this is the happy moment for our we having before the happy moment even is short ..but i think that is enuff .now ..me and D ady no study at utar lo…left u 2 gal only ..gambateh la..u and j jiayou

pls take k my 1st time sing k kaki i will always miss u 2 ..and the happy moment we having before ..keke ..

segi college

the new starting in my education life in segi college it will start the class at tis month 24 maybe is the right place i going to ..but the examation fee is quite expensive le 3 year needs RM11250 or $2250 the tution fee is quite cheap i can pay installment every month RM700 for y1 .to talking the business & mght tis is mix course ..all complete in penang island ..near my house ..keke..